I was trying to explain to my grandma what being bisexual meant and saying that I looked at ladies butts and she was all
"You’re not GAY everyone checks out ladies rear ends" and my sister was like "I have never wanted to look at a ladies butt"
Later my grandma called me and was like “I THINK I MIGHT BE A LITTLE GAY”
BEST GRANDMA STORY
Getting anon hate is a blessing because to know that I pissed a person off so much but they are still afraid of me so they hit that anon button is a confident booster.
remember that one time i told mark sheppard i’d get whatever he replied to me with tattooed on my body
i got that tattoo tonight
i met mark this weekend and the first thing he did was take a picture of me
Confession: I have a friend who likes to text me at like 4am when he’s had nightmares or he can’t sleep or he just needs a friend. He thinks I’m always awake at 4am but really I go to bed around 12am and I change his text-tone to the loudest one I have just so it wakes me up when he needs me.
you’re the kind of friend everyone needs
when you find a very funny meme
when you show your friend the humorous meme
and he also has a giggle at it
"the weather seems ruff today doesnt it Spot haha?"
"dont patronize me Greg"
Leaf bug (Phyllium giganteum)
The constant wobbling as they move is a part of their disguise, making it seem as though the “leaf” is only moving because of a light breeze.
If you blow on one it will also shake around in the hopes of matching any actual surrounding leaves
i automatically classify anything over $5 as expensive
DEAR SWEET GOD
I WAS TRYING TO EDIT THIS GIF:
AND THIS MONSTROSITY HAPPENED
GOD ON HIGH HEAR MY PRAYER